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05/30/2005 Entry: "Road rage in Mexico City"
I would like to ask you to close your eyes and imagine for a minute the following scenario happening in a civilized country (no, not Mexico, not for several decades at least). You are sitting in a taxi going to a business meeting. As always the traffic is a nightmare, a reassuring sight otherwise you would have to find another subject to bitch about life in a megalopolis. A black Mercedes Benz 500SEL overtakes your car on the right. You catch a glimpse of a girl with extra-dyed blonde braids. Probably some pop star in a hurry for her daily hair rescue session?
Your driver sets about to incorporate into the main flow of traffic crawling at snail’s pace on the adjacent highway. All the sudden, another black car with a nasty aggressive look appears out of nowhere and instead of getting in line like all the other drivers decides to force entry in front of your taxi. Quite naturally, your driver pulls ahead and prevents this from happening. You have been in that line for quite a while now and since Louis XVI had his neck shaved by Dr. Guillotin in the late 18th century, privileges have been abolished. Or so you think!
A loud thud brings you back to reality: the driver of the black car is banging your right door with his fist. “Give me a chance” he screams. At that precise moment you notice what should have been obvious from the shining look of intelligence of that man, his cheap suit and his no less glimmering Ray Bans – you’re dealing with the cream of Mexican society, a body guard and his partner in crime sitting next to him. Further ahead the black Mercedes stands still, the engine humming, waiting for the escort to open a way into the solid belt of steel of peak-time traffic.
Blame your driver’s testosterones or natural Latin macho pride, but the taxi doesn’t obey the repeated injunctions and peacefully gains a respectable ten yards in the direction of the highway. You have lost sight of the would-be Kevin Costner’s and are back to your routine thoughts involving the ever so important non-events of daily life. BANG! A loud, blunt, noise crashes in your ears – the body guard’s team-mate has whacked with all his simian strength the grip of his pistol on the trunk of your car, making a serious dent in the metal. He’s now walking back to his car, still as black as the obituary to his lost self-control.
At that instant many possibilities present themselves to your feverish mind, including stepping out and asking that primitive creature what on earth possessed him to do something so damned silly?! Then your knowledge of Mexico kicks-in – he has a gun, he is probably an ex-cop of the hated “Policia Judicial” with a life of lawlessness behind him, he wouldn’t hesitate a second to apply the same treatment to your teeth that he did to the taxi’s trunk and would most likely go unpunished and proud of his deed. Who knows, the diva in the Mercedes might even give him a raise for his so valiantly protecting her precious life – and allowing her to get on time to have her nails varnished!
Morale of the story: in Mexico the rules of the game are different, if you see two idiots with dark glasses hugging the rear tires of a luxury car, don’t try to play with their peanut-sized brains, just smile and let them have their moment of glory – it will surely shine as a beacon in their lives of misery. You’ll fly out of there one day, they never will.
Replies: 4 comments
i think this shooting of the bodyguard was just something really out of the common in mexico city and even in the rest of mexico, mexico is not that violent most of the times (while knowing some aspects of security in here u may be pretty safe),im mexican and i had never heard about a situation similar to this one before, i just imagine what are the foreigners thinking about mexico city after this shamefull situation, they most be really freightened!,
i enjoyed ur post its interesting how a foreinger sees my home town, its quite wierd although, lol
xoxox
Posted by spoon @ 08/01/2005 03:15 AM MEX
I´ve included a post of your website in my blog. Hope you don´t mind. Your site is one of my favorites, hope you can update it more often.
Posted by Luiz @ 06/13/2005 08:07 PM MEX
Hi, I am a new reader of your weblog.
I lived in the DF from '96-'98, and yes, the traffic was pure insanity. Fortunately, I did not personally experience the road rage you describe. That must have been frightening. Must they act so barbaric? I almost feel like apologizing on behalf of the capitalinos, but this kind of road rage (or worse) is possible anywhere.
Cheers!
BB, Midwest USA
Posted by La Bibi @ 05/31/2005 07:42 PM MEX
Well, if I close my eyes I cannot read the blog! haha
If I may also comment, I recently experience the same road rage when driving south from my current home town to Miami. I could tell when I was approaching the big city, while the anxious drivers started to pull their lights to me constantly... (when I was already 5 miles over the speed limit!) were they previous habitants of Mexico City? Don't know...!
This is a very entertaining and well written post. The imaginative part is doubtful, because it truly looks like a faithful portrait of the driving and riding experiences in my mind, as the one of the strongest memories I hold from Mexico City.
Posted by Juliana @ 05/31/2005 09:06 AM MEX
